Jim and I enjoyed a lovely weekend this past weekend without any children! My kids went to their grandmothers and Eriq went to his mother's for the weekend.
Eriq returned home on time and relatively cooperative. He did his chores in a timely manner and started homework. He worked on homework until bedtime at 10pm.
The next day, Monday, it all changes with a series of problems all night long. For example, after dinner we asked Eriq how he was doing with jeans for school. He said he still had 2-3 pairs so he was good for now. OK, we move on to homework. First, that morning I sent with him a language arts lesson to be completed at school, but he forgot the papers at school so we can't verify that the work was done. With Eriq, I've learned when the papers don't make it home, it's because he didn't do them an and not bringing them home is the easiest. Anyway, I gave him a math lesson to complete that he already started so sat in the living room doing the 40 math problems for about three hours. I reviewed the lesson and knew that many, probably half of the questions, were wrong. I explained to Eriq that alot of the questions were wrong and asked if he wanted another opportunity to try again or if he wanted to move on to the next lesson. I could see from his face that he didn't want to correct the math, but knew that was the right answer. He thought about it and finally said, after some encouraging from Dad, to redo the math lesson. He worked on it for about 30 minutes and said he was done with it, although there were still many questions wrong. I submitted the lesson as is--I can't force him to care or to do the work. That has to come from him. BTW, during the time he was doing his homework, he was constantly picking at pimples, skin, jeans, the rug and laying down on the table whenever we were looking, and fidgeting with anything else he can get his hands on. Is that the ADHD the doctors claim or is it avoidance of doing homework?
At quiet time, I ask Eriq to go get clothes ready for school. He brings out two pairs of jeans that have paint all over the bottom. I asked where the pants were that he said he had for school and I guess these were them. Long story short, I advised Eriq that school clothes must be clean, wrinkle free, paint free, without holes and in generally good condition. He didn't have any clothes that match those criteria so he was doing laundry during quiet time. Quiet time in our house is at 8:30pm and that means all kids in the house are to be in their rooms, quiet during the remainder of the evening. Somehow, every night, Eriq has a problem getting into quiet time when he's supposed to be. Last night he was in the shower when 8:30pm rolled around so I went into the bathroom and shut the water off. Shower is over. Get in your room. Jim and I went into our room about 9:30pm and Eriq was in his room working on school work. I got up at 10:10pm to go to the bathroom and Eriq was in his room asleep although he was supposed to be working on school lessons until 10pm. He is sooooo far behind in his lesson and won'to do any during the school day at the behavior school so we have no choice but to do them in the evenings, yet Eriq draws, sleeps and anything else he can to avoid doing the work, making it a very long and tedious process.
Last night I was very upset with Jim about Eriq. I feel daily that the weight of Eriq and his problems are coming down on me. Jim sits in the chair and "supervises" Eriq, but does nothing with his school work, at my request, I admit and is generally inattentive to Eriq's behaviors. I don't want to see or deal with them, either, but what choice do we have?????
Today I called the bus garage to find out what bus Eriq is supposed to be riding. Turns out he is riding the bus he is supposed to but is causing problems on the bus. The bus driver complained to the head of transportation that Eriq was taking bananas out of his lunch and smearing them across the bus seats. I asked if this happened once and was advised that it has happened for a few days and they are requesting that he not have any more bananas in his lunch. Seriously? What makes a child that is almost 15 years old smear bananas across the seat of the bus????? I suspect it's a retaliation against his dad because Dad wants him to sit in the front seat of the bus. But what's going to happen? He smears banana across the bus seats, so he gets the privilege of sitting anywhere? That doesn't even make sense. It's just another no win situation with Eriq. We discipline him and make him sit in the front of the bus so he smears bananas on the bus seats. We don't let him have any more bananas (obviously), so he will do something else. Where does it end?
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